Brandi’s been tricking out the laptop for the trip, so I’m just checking to see if all is well in blog-ville.

… Did you check out my skillz?

This is part of Jennifer Beals’ speech at an event to commemorate the Season 6 Finale of The L Word and also Eve Ensler’s V-Day organization…

The fact is we are all, no matter where we live, surrounded constantly by stories, whether they are literal, oral or visual. In November I went to visit my brother in Ethiopia. He works for the UN. We were walking down the road and I saw a donkey hobbling under the weight of the wood it was carrying. I said to my brother it must be so hard to be a donkey in Ethiopia. He turned to me and said it’s much harder to be a woman. And sure enough, when I looked more closely, behind the donkey was a woman carrying twice as much wood. Beside the woman was a man talking to the woman, carrying only his cellphone. This story is told to every girl, every boy, every man, every woman every day in Ethiopia. It is a benign story compared to the ones of genital mutilation in the countryside, but I think it’s the “benign” story that tells us what is unapologetically codified within the culture.

As for the U.S. the benign story I’m really growing tired of is the “humorous” story of the blonde woman who is either injured or humiliated all in order to sell beer. Not funny. I am tired of these stories. I am angered by these stories. There are other stories far more wondrous — stories of women claiming and reclaiming power, stories of rage and resistance and indefatigable courage, and stories of women and some men — reaching across great divides and into the most treacherous places on Earth where turmoil reigns and violence against women is unchecked, taking the hands of those women, helping to lift them up and leading them toward safety and sanctuary and self-determination.

Those are the stories of V-Day.

I’ve come to understand through taking part in telling many stories of many women, but especially in these last six years telling the stories of The L word — I’ve come to understand that telling stories in and of itself is a radical act. It’s an act that changes hearts and minds. Representing, proclaiming, truth telling, story telling progresses the culture. The right story, at the right time can move society forward, palpably, perceptibly and effectively. I’ve come to understand that while history may indeed be written by the victors we will make ourselves victorious by writing our own histories.

I made a new artwork. Actually I made two, but this is just one of them. They will both be uploaded to my gallery page within the next couple of days.

This weekend when I was hanging out with family, I found the chimp picture. It was just a post card but I noticed it right away. I realized in portrait style how incredibly similar it looks to a human face.

To me, this artwork speaks to the cyclical nature of life (obviously). I really think about how in the in between stages somewhere between monkey and death we’ve made up these things like celebrity and elitist mentalities. It’s so silly really. What’s the point? All we have is our life. We are our only real possession. That’s the one possession that we all share. Some take it and some give it, but along the path everything that we distract ourselves with is just that… a distraction. Distraction from what though? And why are we as a collective so busy convincing ourselves that we are not part of every other living thing on this planet? Why does it make someone better than someone else to have a big house, a nice car, or a pressed shirt? When all those status symbols are gone, we have the same ONE possession as our pets, as the bugs we poison in our homes.

Why waste your time focused on distractions? What are we distracting ourselves from?

T

This will be the first of many, hopefully. I’ve never been so great at journaling, but since I’m soon to be on the other side of the world from the people I love I thought it’d be a great time to start. I’m really excited about our website. Brandi is using it for obvious reasons, but I’m really wanting to use it to develop myself. I have so much creation swirling around in my head, but for whatever reason it’s not making its way out yet… I need to change that. I think that NZ will be a great catalyst for me. There are so many things that I want to do and things that I want to become. I don’t feel like those things can happen here for whatever reason. A million reasons and none at the same time.

What do I want out of this move? I want to become my most authentic self. I feel like I need a new place, new people, new ideas… a new consciousness. I feel like I know what this place has to offer. I know our culture/our society and I know how to react accordingly and within the “acceptable” social parameters… I want to not know the rules. I want to be expanded. This place does not expand me anymore. I feel like existing is about expanding. If you are not learning and pushing then you are still… and if you’re still, you’re dead.

I want to create. I want to start over. I want to pioneer. Discover. Fail and succeed.

I’ve felt lately like the people who mean the most to me don’t really know me, and I feel like that is my own doing. I’ve always walled myself off in order to achieve an emotional inaccessibility. The ultimate defense. I’m not in that place anymore. I want my loved ones to know me, without reservation. I hope by sharing my thoughts (on this blog) and my art (on the website) a more 3-dimensional portrait will surface.

Anyway. I hope you check back, and come with me on this ride. Enjoy our creation.

TRG